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wasn't feeling reali good after last nite.. having tis guilt in me.. hmm.. baobei ,bunny jie n kelly cheered me up.. feeling happy nw.. =)

17th may 08
baobei cooked for us at amy bro's hse.. i love baobei's cooking.. =)
slack at bro's place wif xx n baobei.. jasper bro n kat came after dat ard 2plus.. i wanna sleep!!!!

loves.. hope we'll be tis close alwaiz..

Our KL trip - 4days, 3 nites
Eat eat eat - Buikit Bintang, Petaling St, KLCC, Time Square
Sleep sleep sleep – Berjaya Time Square
Shop shop shop – Bukit Bintang, Petaling St, KLCC, Time Square
Play play play – Time Square Cosmo Theme Park, shooters and ladder game

My first trip wif CLSW my “alwaiz” baobei.. enjoyed/loves each n every second spent wif u.. including the tantrum tat woke me up from my sweet dream.. haaha.. I woke up wif that blur look.. n faster get changed n off to Theme park.

Baobei enjoyed herself during the trip !!!!!!!!! tat’s the most important thing… let’s plan our 2nd trip.. Whee =)
Someone actually had supper wif me every nite.. n its reali a feast.. yumm..
I’m beginning to lyk Korean cuisine.. haaha..

Exams are round the corner.. must concentrate k.. keep ur mind off all the redundant tots.. if wanna haf ramdom tots, haf it after all ur papers.. dun let it affect ur studies k.. let’s go studying.. hmm.. go library.. haaha.. I can read my books n sleep.. =D I wanna read weather climate, geographic, Atlas etc.. haaha.. my favourite books.. these are the onli books which will nt haf yawning effect on me.. =D

Loves CL
From jovetubbies aka xiao maomao aka SBT (sensored) =D

This Blog Is Especially For My Darling Baobei CL.

We had our enjoyable and sweet moments these 2mths irregardless of the numerous minor down point. We had our smiles n laughter though I know they did not really contain happiness, I really appreciate the effort you put up in in order to show a strong front.

At times I might piss you off in a way or another, but do believe that it is out of unintentional. I’m trying my best to be an ABC towards all your “emo” postings etc. This pillar of yours will always try to remain strong for you to lean n cry on.

I appreciate the times when you came all the way to surprise me, to bring smile back on my face when I’m down or pissed, accompanying me to gatherings despite the fact that you’re tired, accommodating me to have meals at certain areas when you feel like having it elsewhere; because you’re aware I’m hard up, catching the bus home early though you feel like going out have fun; because you know I’ve to take last bus home.

Every single thing you do, I’m really appreciative cause its YOU who’s making all the efforts. The 2 promises I made to you, I’ll remember and fulfill.


Winter snow is falling down
Children laughing all around
Lights are turning on
Like a fairy tale come true

Sitting by the fire we made
You’re the answer when I prayed
I would find someone
And baby I found you

Chorus:All I want is to hold you forever
All I need is you more every day
You saved my heart
From being broken apart
You gave your love away
And I’m thankful every day
For the gift

Watching as you softly sleep
What I’d give if I could keep
Just this moment
If only time stood still
But the colors fade away
And the years will make us grey
But baby in my eyes
You’ll still be beautiful

Chorus:All I want is to hold you forever
All I need is you more every day
You saved my heart
From being broken apart
You gave your love away
And I’m thankful every day
For the gift

(piano solo)

Chorus:All I want is to hold you forever
All I need is you more every day
You saved my heart
From being broken apart
You gave your love away
I can’t find the words to say
That I’m thankful everyday
For the gif

? ? ? ?

Like I said, if one is matured enough to understand the necessity of the particular conversation, UNNECESSARY conflicts are avoidable. However, I guess I was proven wrong.

Everything is jus so simple. It all depends on how u looked at it.

Reply with harshness to the one who stir things up, not the one who sit n listens.
For the one who sits n listens did nothing.


For one to make such harsh remarks/comments truly portrays herself to others she tired. But how many have put a thought to the one who sits and cry silently to herself.

Friends will not be caught in between if there’s no unnecessary “passing of updates to another” thus causing unnecessary conversations which allows 3rd / 4th parties to get affected.

Everyone is starting afresh. However, anyone with the right sense of mind and heart will tends to reminisce and hold back the beautiful memories that were once created. There’s no need for any harshness in forcing anyone to leave ultimately.

Sad to say, there’s no need for a “hope” that it’ll be the last time giving such a speech. For the one who cries silently truly understand your intentions. Therefore, I sincerely appreciate you’ll allow her to leave without any further harshness.

Thou shall probe no further into thee life if above mentioned can be settled peacefully. No one has the abilities to disrupt your mindset. Others can fuck your mind but it’s oneself who make all decisions in regards to heart affairs. So, put off that blame on others for your own doings/decisions

Disappointment filled me once again and this time it really slap hard.

Thanks jasper bro for your eggy Maggie and the 2ppl mj session. The warmness came at the rite time.
Loves..

it was till ytd dat i realise.. waiting, miracles, pinning of hopes exists..
I wished.. I hoped.. bt I’ll rather

Alrite.. I’m here to blog.. =)
Guess wad.. baobei came fetch me from work ytd again.. =D bt.. tis silly goose walked all the way from cityhall to my working place.. diaox.. its lyk soooo far can.. almost ½ hour walk.. under the hot sun??!! diaox.. hmm.. *touch* but there’s a sense of indescribable feeling.. I dunno.. just hate to see her being alone.. moreover walking so far under the sun.. =(

Hmm.. ok.. another confession.. ya.. there was a tiny tweeny emo feeling ytd.. =P bt was ok after seeing her.. hmm.. silly goose alwaiz try to make my day though she was feeling tiny tweeny emo herself.. dat’s wad made me strong.. =)

I received a surprise on 9th April.. she sang a song for me wor.. heez… the title of the song is… haaha.. one of my favourite song.. neva for once tot she’ll the one singing for it me.. =D
though she wasn’t feeling reali good at tat point of time.. be it physically or mentally.. she managed to brings a smile.. loves..

tis few days were sweet.. has been slacking at baobei's place.. hmm.. i'm no longer shy.. haaha.. i loves vitamins.. =P

baobei.. i know u ain't feeling ok at times.. i'll try nt to be emo k.. =)
i noe i haffa be stronger than u are.. in order to be there for u.. helping to keep u going strong..
things ain't easy for u now.. jus take things easy k.. =) i'll try my best to make u find ur smiles again..
i'm learning to read ur blog wif a "bo chap" mindset..
dun worry bout me ya.. =)
wad matters most to me is finding ur smiles n xingfu back again..
i dun care whether doing silly things iszit being considered a clown.. all i noe is as long as it makes u smile.. i'll smile.. =)
loves..

3 vitamins today.. omg.. *thump thump thump... pooof* hrt flew off..
went amy bro's place for feasting together wif xx, baobei n yun.. fun fun fun.. slack at bro's hse after xx n yun went off.. haaha.. fell asleep as usual.. o.O after i wake up, baobei fell asleep.. we left ard 3plus to her hse.. slack n chat at the playground area till morning 7am..
thank baobei for accompanying me.. i noe u're tired n ur eyes are lyk half close.. =)
loves.. muackz.. =D

no more emo chimp again.. heez.. loves.. smooochhhhh...
we'll stay in our dreams lyk tis forever..
no more disturbance.. i'll protect u from them all..
will neva scold u when u cry.. will onli wipe tears off ur eyes.. n make u smile..


companied baobei to her class ytd.. i fell asleep in class.. haaha..
luckily neva snore.. *shy*
went haf dinner at KAP Mac... happy..

no longer noes wad lies in future..

baobei gave me a pleasant surprise today.. she came fetch me from work.. *happy n touched*

28.03.08
Met baobei at TYP n proceed to turf city to collect our first car.. we rented Fiat 8597.. nice no.
We drove to Nicole’s place for steamboat and stayed there till 11plus.. we routed ard jurong areas den decided to go amk play pool.. when we arrive amk, amy called n ask us to fetch her home from boat quay.. off we go.. heez.. baobei drove me back home after picking up amy..

29.03.08
Woke up earli to cook lunch for baobei.. made her cod fish with broccoli and potato cubes.. she came fetch me after work ard 1.30pm.. yeah.. feeling great.. she had her lunch in the car at my hse downstair n we’re off to the zoo.. she loved the white tigers there, also penguins n manatees, haaha.. I love the baboons, penguins n giraffes there.. I went for my KFC at zoo.. yes!! we proceed to her clubhouse bathe n went fetch shikin and marlyn at their place.. wow.. one end to another.. heez.. met Adeline n boon at far east for dinner at far east.. baobei was in her clubbing mood.. n we left for dbl O.. met her frens kenneth n dom there.. din reali drink much.. =P opps.. we drove to hkg café for our supper ard 4plus.. n she drove me home cuz I need to wake up ard 7plus..
Baobei n frens went T3 without me.. wad??!! Without me… hmfph!!!

30.03.08
tis day was fun n slacky.. hmm.. actually was feeling bery xingfu/sweet.. =P
we woke up ard 2pm.. n baobei came fetch me ard 3plus.. we drove to haf our late lunch.. Bak Kut Teh at Beo Crescent.. haaha.. blur chimp make poor baobei drove round n round the area.. luckily we manage to find it.. heez.. =P ordered baobei’s favourite food.. yummy.. tink of it make me drools.. heez.. after lunch we decided to drop by great world city to shop for big bird’s present. I lost my hp while trying clothes at Esprit.. luckily baobei help me got it back.. heez.. if nt all my msgs will be gone.. *cries*
after shopping, brought baobei to haf dessert - cheesecake treat.. =) she gt herself a strawberry cheesey mousse n lime juice I got myself bailey’s cheesecake wif morning ape.. yum.. haaha.. baobei’s horror.. morning ape!!
After our treat, we went collect our car n drove to Esmirada for dinner.. nice nice.. they had their “good luck day” n the waitress start smashing plates on the concrete floor.. baobei tried smashing 1 too.. heez..
Hmm.. we drove to mosque st. to look for big bird.. she had her singing competition at Yuan Dian.. we stayed for awhile n left for our ECP.. yeah.. I love beach trip at nite.. keke.. guided baobei to my fav. Spot n we sat there from 11plus to 1plus.. n we packed mac on the way back..
Heez.. I wanna go ECP wif u again.. l wanna watch sunrise wif u.. =)
Reali enjoy the times spent wif baobei.. i love going beach with baobei at nite.. heez.. huggies!!!!

lost carebear looking for other bears.. Where u guys.. Bring me home..

disappointment is all i felt..
or is there a better word to describe in this whole senario?

//
warmest blessings given or iszit jus some kinda prank..
\\

experienced a kaleidoscope right before my eyes.. formed from rays of light and droplets..

i've received a surprised xiuxiu from her ytd.. was reali surprised that she actualli went to find n got it for me when she learnt tat i lost it.. feelings for her is growing stronger each day.. i wanna bring her to wherever she wanna go.. eat wadever she wanna eat.. do wadever she wanna do.. as long as she's happy.. jus wish to see her happy n xingfu alwaiz..

finalli i found the rite song to sing to her.. >

felt kinda sad cuz i left her alone last nite.. dunno y having tis feeling.. jus felt bery sad y did i leave her alone.. =(

>

Unintentional and unaware feelings do actually exist..
Pampering her in my very own ways..
Nv for once show her attitude/temper..
Noticing all her small little movements..
Making complaints bout her just to cover up unintentionally..
All these I realized only now..

We had our first date on 29th Feb.. brought her to goodwood park coffee lounge for dinner..
Gave her a nice surprise.. =) met up wif xx after dat n went NOS.. had our midnite movies after NOS..

Went to Evon’s chalet on 1st Mar.. apparently, a disastrous thing happened…

12th Mar she had her ladies session.. I went to meet big bird n fren at NOS.. went over earlier n had drinks alone..
She gave me surprise by poping up suddenly.. no words describes my feelings at that point of time bt jus hug her tightly.. its so sweet of her.. –melt totally-

Went to big bird’s chalet on 18th Mar.. I bbq for her while she rush her assignments out.. drank quite a lot.. cuz was feeling happy.. we drove out to get more beer.. n I bought her her favourite ben’s & jerry ice cream.. felt so xingfu in the car.. my dream scene.. love dat chalet trip so much.. =D left on 19th morning n went white sand’s mac.. accompanied her from 10plus till 6plus.. she finalli finished her assignment..

Jus wanna say.. the times spent wif u are memorable.. it brings me happiness.. n I’m going to announce out loud.. I’m going after Charmaine Lim Shi Wei.. my baobei.. i wanna hold your hands for as long as I can.. so make sure u’re alwaiz feeling cold k.. i wanna see ur sleepy morning look alwaiz.. n u'll alwaiz falls under category 1, 2 & 3 no matter wad.. =D

be it past n present, i'll neva change the way i treat u.. the same old treatment that u've alwaiz noe.. n towards u, i'll alwaiz be smiley.. i'll neva have the need to complain anymore.. =D

i moved out to jasper's place - 1st day

vex...

Lyk wad did I do.. fuck you lor.. feel lyk moving out to stay.. if onli my mom allow.. bt I noe she wun.. bt maybe tis time she’ll allow.. for a few days maybe.. to stay away from things.. he wan me to move out den move out lah.. lyk I scare of him.. I dun gif a fuck to him lor..
Argh.. 2008 suppose to be a great yr for me isn’t it.. bt y??

*tears drop*

Y do I still feel tis way.. y do I still feel the pain when she’s feeling sad n cried..
Iszit cuz of the close bondage between us or .. what should I do??
Tears drop..

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Busy busy today.. mistakes n compounds from my accounts.. felt bad.. feel lyk leaving at times.. bt.. haiz.. nvm..
I’m bored.. lifeless.. no longer looking forward to after work.. everyone’s dead..

Finalli its 6pm.. meeting nasty for dinner.. yeah..

feeling so sucks everyday.. everything in life sucks.. argh.. fuck off.. emo.. Hope my institution is wrong tis time.. who will be there.. -sob- *lost trust*

being an emo nowsaday.. losing my direction.. are we still going to the trip.. her words/cries still rang in my mind.. y do i still feel the pain.. hello.. is there anyone out there?

2008 wishes: jus hope each n everyone of us will be back again.. i miss all of u.. everyone's missing in action will help the group to be united ma? ain't we suppose to be united? where's all the love, care n concern?

i'm sorry.. i've neva meant to hurt you.. hurting u is the last thing i'll ever do.. intoxication causes my unreasonable behaviour.. i was such a bastard.. i've neva mean the way i said.. pls dun cry.. it reali hurts to hear u cry esp i'm the one tis time causing u to tear.. i've alwaiz tot i'll neva be the one to make u cry.. bt i did.. u're alwaiz the one ya.. i love you..

i'm a fucking retard.. to hell..

2007 has finally past.. reflections of 2007 brings heartache. Love sucks..

New resolution for 2008..
Yang Gf for lives..
earn more money..
get my fucking license..
more clothes..
Looking good..

Wad’s wrong? Everything doesn’t seems in place.. emo.. argh.. tell me wad should I do.. felt so lost suddenly.. everything’s nt rite.. arghh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All at once,
I finally took a moment and I'm realizing that
Your not coming back
And it finally hit me
All at once
All at once
I started counting teardrops and at least a million fell
My eyes began to swell
And all my dreams were shattered
All at once
Ever since I met you
You're the only love I've known
And I can't forget you
So I must face it all alone
Chorus:
All at once
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Wishing you'd come back to me
And that's all that matters now
All at once
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Holding on to memories
And it hurts me more than you know
So much more than it shows
All at once
All at once,
I looked around and found that you were with another love
In someone else's arms
And all my dreams were shattered
All at once
All at once
The smile that used to greet me brightened someone else's day
She took your smile away
And left me with just memories
All at once
Ever since I met you
You're the only love I've known
And I can't forget you
So I must face it all alone
Chorus:
All at once
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Wishing you'd come back to me
And that's all that matters now
All at once
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Holding on to memories
And it hurts me more than you know
So much more than it shows
All at once

left work earli ard 6pm on wed 08.08.. took a train to bugis wif aspe cuz we need to check into the hotel.. poor aspe.. the hotel was book by her for her gf de.. bt haiz.. in the end she's going stay over wif me n jesse n jasper.. after checking in, she went to bathe n we left for town.. so diaox can.. so wierd checking in wif her.. hmm.. we went to find reb.. aspe tried to persuade her to go.. bt she insist nt to.. haiz.. den we went down to "her" workplace.. heez.. finalli can get to see her le.. had too much drink dat day.. went over to adele's pub for drink cuz me n her hubby challenge.. haha.. when i went back to her pub, i was lyk so high le.. we order porridge n eat.. adeline fed me cuz i burn my lip n refuse to eat le.. den she came over n eat my porridge.. den i say i wanna eat n she fed me wor.. heez.. hmm.. was bery seh dat day.. den went to toliet n puke.. before going home, i try to finish my porridge.. haha.. it was lyk kinda cold le.. den she saw me eating she say she oso wan.. so i feed her the porridge.. keke.. first time feeding her wor.. felt so sweet.. hmm..
we went back to the hotel wif adeline after dat.. jasper din meet us cuz she went somewhere else.. diaox.. we slept ard 4plus.. she complained dat i snore.. haha.. poor thing.. she din get to sleep.. i was woke up by her cuz she went to puke ard 7plus.. she puke 5times siaz.. poor thing.. took care of her.. hope she feels better.. hmm.. i noe she's tired le.. made her sleep by tapping her.. bt she din fall asleep.. instead i fell asleep.. haha.. she ask me lie down n sleep cuz she noes i'm tired le.. hmm.. felt so xin fu to sleep beside her.. first time wor.. haha.. aspe shifted to the side.. n she's lyk sleeping lyk a pig.. O.o" we left bugis ard 1plus.. went home n sleep.. woke up ard 5plus 6.. wanted to go fetch her when she go meet michelle.. bt i din.. hmm.. so i went town to find amy for dinner..

she came to far east for dinner at long john wif michelle.. hmm.. i met them den we deciding where to go.. in the end we finalise to go "live pub" haha.. we reach there n we played pool.. enjoy myself lots.. we stayed till closing.. n suddenly alac called n tell her her ex at PLAY.. michelle wanna go down.. den they left me.. i bery she bu de she go over.. bt i let her go.. din follow cuz i'm kinda broke le.. bt after they left, i felt bery bu fan xin.. called jasper for a chat.. after dat i walked from LIDO to maxwell.. the journey was damn long.. my legs are lyk so tired.. hmm.. din wanna take cab cuz i tot of reaching there jus in time for the closing.. den she can come out.. dowan reach earli n make her come out.. when i reach, i called her n she ask where am i.. i told her i'm outside play.. she was bery shock.. n ask me y i come over.. i told her cuz i bu fan xin her go meet her ex.. she noes i walked over n she ask y i so "sa" come all the way to find her.. she went in play to bring out tissue for me cuz she saw dat i was bery hot.. dunno y i'm alwaiz so "Sa" for her.. jus wanna protect her n let her be happy.. dun wish to see her cry anymore.. many ppl say i'm bery "Sa".. bt i felt its sweet.. jasper bro call me silly fool when she noes i'm going over find her.. hmm.. she came down look for me n haf supper at maxwell.. den she help me send her home..

tis morning woke up.. felt so sick.. when i on the bus, bee eng say i'm having high fever.. tink its cuz of last nite i was bery sweaty n the wind keep blowing me.. dat's y got a cold le.. today dun tink i going find her le ba.. hmm.. dowan her to see the sick me.. dun wish tat she feel guilty cuz of her i got sick.. i go find her tml ba.. heez. kk.. janet's in office le.. better go work now..

01/08/07
today after work went down to find her at her workplace.. i brought her a big rose.. it did cheer her up.. :) i accompanied her till she finish work n we went over cnc.. met jasper there.. n went supper wif alac, justin, jasper n her.. we stayed there till ard 4plus.. den we took cab home.. hmm.. alac n justin went off first.. we agreed to meet up the next day to go PLAY.

02/08/07
after work went over to find her again.. tis time went wif aspe n reb.. bought her fish porridge cuz her teeth still hurts n can't eat solid food.. n she din haf much dinner.. hmm.. she was surprise to see the porridge.. haha.. bt she said she taken 2nd round dinner le.. so she eat after work.. hmm.. she made a drink n ask me try.. it was nice.. we played pool.. after aspe n reb left, she ate her porridge.. n she make me eat half.. she's soo cute.. can't help bt falling for her.. she let me drink the balance drink which she made.. we drank together from a jug using 2 straw.. haha.. *excited*
after work, we took her co. van to PLAY where we met alac.. i stick close to her cuz i scare i'll lose her..
she went to the toliet n make her hair.. haha.. silly ger.. she spray the head wif her hair spray n everyone was lyk looking at her.. we went to the bar counter there n i watch her dance.. awhile ltr i went out meet jasper.. we stayed out for quite sometime cuz jasper not enuff cash to enter.. den i smuggled jasper in.. we went to 7-11 cuz i bought corets for her.. den we walk back to find her..
hmm.. we left PLAY ard 3plus 4..

04/08/07
went to work ard 10plus cuz overslept.. haha.. stay at workplace till 4plus.. den went to her place fetch her to work.. hmm.. suppose to meet her at 5pm.. bt i was late.. cuz i blur sotong took the wrong side of train.. den reach ard 5.20pm.. haha.. she was late too.. luckily siaz.. she rush down.. n she was lyk so hot.. n her face was so red.. poor thing.. hmm.. we took the train to outram n went to her workplace. in the train.. she ask me to try the porridge.. when we reach her workplace, she got me a glass water.. haha.. i'm lyk so thirsty siaz.. hmm.. haha she order the porridge for me.. n we sat n eat together.. first time so close wif her.. felt so sweet.. was actualli quite full le.. bt i finish up all the porridge cuz it was ordered n paid by her.. after dinner, i went out n walk all over chinatown trying to get her donut.. she wanted to eat the strawberry donut which aspe was queing to get.. bt aspe din manage to get for her.. i scare she'll be disppointed so i din tell her n i went out to find.. i search all the cheers n 7-11 n bakery shops in chinatown.. bt there's none.. ask my colleague.. he told me go maxwell market there.. diaox.. he bluff me.. asshole.. i call him.. n he say dun buy donut lah.. but tau sa piah.. kaoz.. make me walk there to buy tau sa piah.. hmm.. awhile ltr alac came down find us.. we went over to cnc again.. haha.. den we met jasper there n went down to ALL IN pub look for jasper's fren.. n went down OT.. diaox.. she dun reali lyk dat place.. hmm.. i was abit diaox too.. we din reali enjoyed ourself.. we left ard 6am.. went home sleep..

05/08/07
i woke up at 9plus to help my colleagues with the permit.. but i was half sleeping when telling them how to go about amending it.. haha.. finalli i "rudely" awaken by them ard 12plus.. n i told them the actual step.. haha.. guess i was too tired.. haha.. its so farni lor.. tell them all the rubbish.. hmm.. i went back sleep till 3pm.. she missed call me.. n i called back when i wake up.. haha.. she was lyk.. wah.. u now den wake up ar.. den i was lyk ya lor.. den we were tinking where to go.. finalli i decided to go down find amy.. she's ok wif it.. haha.. so i told her meet her at town.. bt i gave her a surprise.. i faster go get changed n went out of hse n rush down to her place.. heez.. i reach le n i msg her say i'm at yew tee le.. she called me half hour ltr n say "omg.. y u here so earli.. sorry.. i chop chop down k.." den she was lyk saying i waited for bery long le.. but i keep assuring her say no its ok.. haha.. told her not to rush down cuz if nt her face will be red n swollen again.. hmm.. finalli get to see her at 7pm.. so happy.. we took train down to town.. haha.. it was a sweet ride for me.. haha.. hmm.. we went to eat kfc.. n went back amy's shop n went down to cnc.. yeah.. finalli amy's coming out wif us.. haha.. we met alac there.. jasper came find us ard 11plus.. hmm.. she lost a game n had to do the fuck dance.. haha.. n i oso lost the game to jasper n had to do 10 star jump.. diaox.. hmm.. had fun there.. when i played pool wif her, i let her win to boost her confidence in pool again.. yeah.. finali she did it.. bt wif more practise.. we sang her fav. song bai se feng che.. haha.. i promise i'll learn n sing wif her.. keke..

aspe called ard 12plus n say she doesn't wanna go home.. she's at reb's blk.. diaox.. we took a cab n rush down find her.. den slack at clementi till 4plus in the morning.. den we take cab back.. so tired wor..

06/08/07

she's nt working today.. haha.. met her at victoria's pub ard 11plus 12 after my work.. hmm.. i went find amy first.. den slowly walk over to the pub.. she's wif michelle.. she look so cute tonite.. haha.. wadever.. she's alwaiz so cute looking.. haha.. bites.. we stayed out till ard 3plus den go home.. her fren ask if i'm sending her home.. i was lyk so paiseh.. i din haf enuff cash.. hmm.. i told her no.. cuz i din haf enuff cash.. O.o den we made our way to the taxi stand.. when she go off, i msg her saying dat i'm sorry.. i couldn't send u home tonite.. she reply me wif a silly n a smiley face n say u take care too.. haha..

07./08/07
was bery broke to go find her.. hmm.. bt i miss her so much.. i made her a rose n bring it down to cheer her up.. cuz she was upset bout something.. hmm. gave her a surprise.. haha.. she din expect to see me outside her workplace.. i pass her my corets.. n tell her dat i wun be able to meet u these 2 days.. u haf my corets n eat them when i'm nt ard u k.. she smile n take it.. haha.. i miss her so much.. felt so wierd nt spending the whole nite wif her..

today staying late in office again.. hmm.. has been working bery late tis whole mth.. now shifted to jurong le.. lagi worse siaz..
hmm.. last fri stayed back at great world to do our final packing.. den sat earli morning went to jurong new office n waited till 4plus den start our packing n all the labour.. got many cuts on my hands.. accidently hurt my finger when i was carrying the heacy cupboard.. got my finger trap under the cupboard n i pull out my finger.. in the end the nails n some skin came off.. hmm.. felt pain bt din realise it bleed till i saw my shirt redred.. haha.. diaox.. hmm.. actualli 30th wanted to meet kelly to pass her things n go mommy hse.. but i realise i've got many things to do.. den gotta stay back in office.. den when i reach mommy hse will be lyk almost 11plus.. hmm.. bt i din tell her lah.. i jus tell her i've got something on so cannot make it.. n in the end we quarrelled badly.. anyway mommy called me the next day n i explain to her le.. she ask me go up visit her one day.. i told her ya i'll.. long time neva see her le.. kinda miss her.. bt tis time i'll be going up alone.. hmm.. dunno how it feels lyk. ahha.. nvm..

hmm.. ltr meeting aspe going to a pub.. dunno aspe can go nt.. she's being asked to the warehouse to help out.. nowsaday everyone has been going to warehouse to help.. cuz reali lack of manpower.. wah.. everyday oso busy siaz.. i din even haf my lunch today.. louise jus complained dat he reach home 12plus 1 last nite siaz.. diaox.. hopefully tis workload will end soon ba.. everyday so tired.. luckily got co.transport bus come pick me everyday at my hse downstair ard 8.10 siaz.. if nt i sure die.. ask me go take bus at 7am to clementi.. hmm.. kk.. gotta go off le.. better hurry finish my things.. if nt gotta stay here till 10plus again le..

我讨厌阴天的风
冷得那么刺痛
只有你能够抚平所有的寂寞
昨天的风筝在角落
被谁丢到了路口
我很不想让你找到离开的理由
每一夜闭上眼睛
我看到了恶梦
你微笑但是旁边的人不是我
天空切开一道裂缝
直接割到我心中
不想装作脆弱
也不想爱得懦弱
其实我非常爱你不想失去你
难道我没有权利说我不愿意
你给了他的吻
虽然只有余温
可知道我多渴望抓住你的心
我知道他很爱你你怕他伤心
我每天假装开心害怕你离去
可不可以任性
求求你不要去
藏在我心里最后一句
其实还爱你
可不可以任性
求求你不要去藏在我心里
最后一句其实还爱你

张栋梁-北极星的眼泪

像断了线
消失人海里面
我的眼终于失去
你的脸
再等一会
奢望流星会出现
愿
如果真的实现
爱能不能永远
明天
或许来不及变
但曾经走过的昨天
越来越远
北极星的眼泪
说不出的想念
原来我们活在两个世界
北极星的眼泪
你哭红的双眼
被淋湿的诺言
淹没在心里面
我抬头看着
爱不见

再等一会
奢望流星会出现
愿
如果真的实现
爱能不能永远
明天
或许来不及变
但曾经走过的昨天
越来越远
北极星的眼泪
说不出的想念
原来我们活在两个世界
北极星的眼泪
你哭红的双眼
被淋湿的诺言
淹没在心里面
我抬头看着爱不见

当对的人等不到对的时间
就在放放开手的瞬间
爱撕成两边

北极星的眼泪
说不出的想念
原来我们活在两个世界
北极星的眼泪
你哭红的双眼
被淋湿的诺言
淹没在心里面
我抬头看着爱不见
整个宇宙都流眼泪

-=there's no forever.. dun promise anything if u can't fulfill.. thanks for letting me noe u cannot make a desicion.. =-

hey.. it was sooo scary.. alrite.. everything started after my work ends.. i met kat at my workplace bus stop.. we make our way to wheelers cafe n waited for jesse. she came about an hour ltr. she went JB.. hmm.. me n kat was lyk playing true or dare.. but we onli play true.. ahahah.. play until sooo sian.. finalli we saw jesse bike.. ahaha.. was sooo happy to see her again. she came n sat beside us.. she was bery tired.. we stayed there n play cards till ard 9.45 den jesse had to go.. she meeting her frens for a drink.. so me n kat left oso. i took a bus home.. was meeting jasmine at my hse downstair for a chat.. had been meetin her at our blks nearby for chat these few nites.. i arrived first den waiting for her to come. she told me to wait for another 20mins..

an indian guy ard mid 20 came n borrowed hp from me to make an urgent call.. i bluff him dat my hp low bat. so din wanna lend him.. on the other hand i msg jasmine n ask her faster come. dat guy waited for bery long.. den he din wanna leave.. in the end i decided to lend him cuz there were afew ppl walking ard. so guess he couldn't run away wif the hp. but the call he made was damn long. he said he wanted to call his mom n ask her bring down the money to pay for his cab fare. i sense something was wrong cuz he told me his mom not at home. but y is he calling home? i followed him ard.. he started to walk away.. of cuz i followed on. he walked further n faster.. den he reached the main road n suddenly a cab came n the door was opened.. he started to run towards the cab.. i ran after him n pull him out of the cab. his frens are the driver n another indian guy sitting in front. he came out of the cab n we struggled bery long.. he pushed n break free n run towards the cab. luckily i managed to stop him jus before he got in. i keep struggling n refuse to let him go.. ahha.. of cuz lah.. my hp cost me 600 mann.. haha.. but in the end despite me grabbing him, he push me away n run to cab. i open the door n snatched my hp away.. he let go of my hp cuz dere's cab behind watching le.

wow.. scary mann.. diaox.. robbed first time in my whole life.. but i was bery surprised dat i had the strength n courage to fight back..

today bery happi.. met jesse n ronson at wheelers cafe.. we sat there as usual n chat. ard 7 plus, ronson make a move first.. he was feeling bery upset cuz of his break up. hmm.. me n jesse sat n chat for awhile till 8plus. sat her bike for the first time. we went SSC wanted to play pool. but it was crowded so she drove to chinatown kaster. heez.. was so scare to sit her bike wor.. but after 2nd trip felt much beter le.. we parked at C&C.. pop in to see if anyone's ard.. but it was lyk sooo quiet.. so we walk to kaster. hmm.. she sang bery nice.. i sang lyk shit.. ahha.. i dun lyk the system there.. hmm.. we stayed till 12 den walk back to her bike.. she wanted to send me home.. cuz it was bery late n if take cab will waste lotsa money. in the end i agreed cuz i wanted to spend more time wif her. heez.. wow.. she speed home mann.. my helmet nearly fly off my head.. diaox.. but the whole ride was bery fun as if the whole road belongs to us. when she reach my hse, i waited for her to keep everything le den i watched her go off.. yeah.. i wanna learn bike in 2 weeks time.. traallalalalala...

i'm back.. been so long since i last blog le.. i gotta noe a ger at C&C.. got a good impression ever since i first saw her on 4th mar.. she was att at tat time.. after dat i went down on 7th again to see if i can see her.. she's not there.. i saw her on 11th mar. i was bery happi.. i chat wif her during pool games.. she's 26 yr old.. been missing her since 4th wor.. its lyk wow.. other than xb, she's the 2nd ger in my life i've fallen for n is older than me by 3 yr.. hmm.. guess its jus crush ba..
11th mar, she quarrelled wif her gf.. she sounded bery sad.. i met her on 12th mar at C&C again. she looked bery haggard.. i was feeling bery sad.. y should i feel sad.. its onli a crush.. i asked her out on 13th mar. she seems lyk she's another person.. i was bery upset to see her lyk tis.. realli bery upset.. the feeling is bery different from past crush n likings.. i guess i luv her.. hmm.. i noe i'm not her type.. i jus wanna be by her side letting her noe she's not alone.. it realli hurts me to see her tis way.. can i do something to help her ease the pain?? i wanted to apply a whole week's off jus to accompany her.. at least she's not alone n she wun tink so much.. but i couldn't.. i can onli wait till after 28th.. hmm.. jus pray n hope she'll get over tis soon..

hey bloggy.. long time din blog le.. hmm.. my bloggy got miss me??? heez.. well my readers does i guess.. ahahah.. owner.. i miss u too.. long time nia see u le.. hmm.. dunno wadda blog leh.. nvm.. shall tok bout my fri nite..oh no.. its one of the worst nite mann.. me, xb,laopa,asa,jason,marie,lionel n his wife went blue hut for dinner n a drink.. woohoo.. we ordered a few jugs of beer.. den all left except me, xb n jsaon, me n xb shared a bottle of red wine.. wow. got drunk after dat one bottle mann.. after dat we ordered another bottle of white wine.. hahah.. dat got both of us down.. jason was lyk a mad man taking care of us when we were lyk sleeping n puking siaz.. yucks.. hmm.. xb cried dat nite cuz of her problems.. she keep saying guys sucks.. gers better. ahah.. she held my hands n ask if i still lyk her.. hmm.. anyway i noe she's drunk. so din tink much oso.. was surprised how i managed to keep my cool self..

was online today.. den happen to noe tis ger "melissa" heez.. she's nice.. a dancer.. saw her friendster.. hey dat's when i saw tis "zaeron" on my friendster.. haahah.. tink i noe her gf.. her gf is someone i used to play n go out wif when we're lyk pri skool.. hmm.. was bery surprised dat she turn out to be a passive wor..
sent her a msg on friendster.. wonders if she will reply.. nvm.. k lah.. tink i shall stop here.. heez.. ciaoz...

whee.. we cook macaroni for lunch today at office.. hmm.. wow.. for the whole week it was lyk so fun.. bout 10 of us eating in the conference room.. hmm.. last thurs we had sushi, fri n monday had porridge n today had marcaroni.. yum.. tml we're going haf claypot rice wor.. wow.. so much dish we can come up wif jus one additional rice cooker.. we cook together n wash our bowls n everything together.. heez.. felt so much closer nowsaday..

ytd met jasper bro for kbox at cine.. hmm.. we sang for bout an hour den her gf came.. its was their anni actualli.. haha.. din feel awakard cuz we're all so close.. :P we left cine ard 11+ cuz her stead haffa be home by 12.. anyway, i've to go off earli too.. thurs having paper le.. hmm.. haben study yet siaz.. i look at the file oso dunno wadda study.. absolutely no mood.. =X

haiz.. tink i better go try read thru ba.. if not thurs can sleep throughout the paper le..

13 trying to study

whee.. i had a bad hair cut today.. went alene's hse.. help her buy her lunchn got her some bread.. she lyk bery poor thing.. hse no food to eat.. i reach her hse ard 3plus...choose a nice hair style from a book.. n she start working on my hair.. after donkey years, she finalli finish almost 4/5 of it.. i wanted to see my hair. oh shit.. my nice hair is gone.. 4/5 of it is on the floor.. she cut too short.. she machiam shave my whole head leaving my fringe. =X well.. she felt so bad about it.. keep asking me to go to those $10 10 min hair cut.. ok lor.. i've got no choice le.. went there to ask them help me settle the mess.. haiz.. my hairy.. all gone.. now felt so botak.. shitty mann..

hmm.. luckily the out turn is still not bad. jus dat i can't style my messy spiky look le.. heez.. she say i look more yandao le wor.. =P after haircut, we went town.. shop ard n waited for my colleague, annie.. she came lyk 7pm.. we went up sakae sushi for dinner.. yum.. i gave alene a treat cuz she now oso no longer working le.. hmm.. n she felt so bad about my hair too.. but anyway today was fun.. annie bought many clothes siaz..

ytd went watch shutter wif karen, xb annie n her hubby steven. the show was nice wor.. heez.. we were lyk arrghh.. throughout the show.. hahah hmm.. first time watch horror movie wif them.. we left bishan ard 10pm. steven drove me to jasmine's hse downstair n met her ard 10plus. she jus came back dat evening. we sat at the next blk n chat till bout 11.30pm.. den i went back.. hmm.. nice to haf someone staying opp my blk.. heez.. can meet up anything when bored.. :P

she asked me last nite online if i lyk her.. well.. i myself oso dunno.. maybe lyk her as companion ba.. anyway she oso lyk someone else.. hmm.. anyway i asked her not to tink so much... to her i'm onli a didi ba.. ahhah..

tonite might be meeting her n lina n mark for a drink.. lina will be giving us a treat.. i dunno if should go or not.. cuz laopa n the rest might be going for crab feast tonite.. yum.. we shall see how ba.. yeah.. another week gone.. tis month must save up for xmas le.. yipee.. oh ya..

13^slacking at work

woohoo.. met jasmine n her 4 frens (mark, xiao jasmine, ocean n lina) ytd at bishan.. we slacked at mos burger till bout 6.30pm.. den jasmine went home for her dinner. we left to walk ard n went amk wait for jasmine to play pool. she came ard 8plus.. hmm.. we played pool till bout 9plus den went s11. i kept playing wif ocean.. cuz the rest alwaiz disappear out for smoke n chat.. diaox.. -_-" from there we went home ard 10plus.. walked wif jasmine to near her hse. den we part n go home.. hmm tis morning she left for malaysia. i walk pass her hse n say bye to her in the morning on my way to work.

*yawn* soo sleepy now.. 4plus in the afternoon.. wanted to go down for tea break wif laopa n ron. but my dept left karen onli.. den she got lotsa work to do.. so decided to stay in.. hmm..

heez.. jus now trick xb.. i went on her speaker loud.. me n karen off our speaker.. den i send an evil laughter to xb's msn.. ahhaha.. she got a shock i guess. the whole office filled wif the evil laughter.. ahahaah.. well.. i got beaten by her as usual.. -_-"

13^slack

ytd left office ard 7pm.. onli me, xb n annie went cine Suki Sushi.. laopa got lotsa things to do so can onli meet us ard 9pm. We stay at Suki till bout 9plus.. yum... spent about $60+. In the end we din meet laopa cuz xb got other program n annie going find steven. I called Kriz bro see where she is.. den met her at cine.. she came wif maine baobei, Ling n her bf... we went upstair to play billard n pool... hmm surprisingly me tis week din touch a single drop of beer wor. We left cine ard 11plus. Dey went monks after dat.. n i went home.. wanted to meet adeline ne her bf at amk for a drink.. but was damn tired.. den somemore today haffa work.. so decided to go home.. heez.. yeah.. ltr going boat quay for an interview at coffeebean. actualli dat's was a fake interview which started on 06 nov.heez.. dat fri i met carol (kitty princess) n luvis.. we went boat quay coffeebean.. saw tis ger not bad looking.. heez.. me n luvis were commenting dat if we work here den can everyday bio her le.. haha.. so we came up wif the idea to go for interview jus to get a chance to tok to her.. she's the manager there. well.. we did get to tok to her.. heez.. n she was surprised dat i wanted to work there.. cuz she say i'm getting a high pay.. y will i wanna work for onli $4/hr.. heez i wanted to reply her "oh work here can pau u marhz.." hahah of cuz din reply her dat.. i told her jus a pastime job =P after dat.. we keep taking turns to go up to her n ask for things lyk pens, n other rubbish.. hahah.. when we're about to go off, i went outside n pass her her pen... she was smoking outside.. so i sat down n join her.. =P we were chating halfway den luvis n carol came out n join us.. heez.. she asked me if my workplace needs staff.. ahah.. i told her u gimme ur no. when dey require staff i'll call u.. =P so we exchanged no. heez.. We left ard 6plus.. i went meet laopa n the rest at parkway crystal jade..*yawn* wah.. now onli 11.20am.. diaox.. still haf another 1 hour to go den can go off le.. 13^ zZzzz

now is 7.39pm le.. still waiting for laopa.. he's helping alisa wif her work i guess.. faster.. me wanna go home le.. soo tired.. yeah.. will be taking his car to bedok.. den i slowly take my bus back.. can sleep on bus le.. ron will be joining us to bedok too.. jus had a pack of maggie mee.. yum.. nice nice.. *burp*

ytd was fun.. me,karen n annie went sakura for dinner.. heez.. we wasted lotsa food n had fun hiding them.. we took 2 jellies for our dessert. We din lyk the flavours.,. jus took for fun.. each of us take a spoon n pass round.. heez.. the other 2 times we went wif alisa.. but ytd she was sick.. hmm.. reached home ard 8plus.. wow.. dat was earli mann..

tml will be another sianz day.. going for class again.. but no choice.. haffa go wor.. cuz lecturer will be giving us tips.. hmm.. tml is oso a happening day for me wor.. i'll be touching on AMS Filing.. wow.. the bery first time me doing wor.. heez.. hope wun be any mistake siaz.. i dowanna pay USD5k mann.. hmm.. once i master dat, i'll complete my USA training le wor.. heez.. today karen ask me.. wad will i wanna be in 5 yrs time.. i told her i wish to be an operation manager lyk my laopa.. heez.. soo nice..

nia chat wif 02 for quite some time on fone le wor.. 02, I MISS YOU!! heez.. nvm.. can shout all i wan.. she wun noe my bloggy.. =P

13^bored.. [missing you lotsa]

yummy.. jus came back from a yummy yummy thai cusine. The dishes there looks cheap but the bill came to be ard 300 plus.. wow.. couldn't believe it mann.. luckily the atmosphere n the food's worth it.. after dinner, we went to the lounge for a drink.. shiok mann..

hmm.. tis week has been drinking n enjoying myself lotsa siaz.. mon had company function.. drank n had indonesian cusine, wed went kbox wif annie,karen,alisa for 6hours.. thurs went kbox wif adeline for 5 hours.. n today (fri) went mercure roxy. wow.. life's so shiok for me siaz..

13 thinking of 02

jus told [02] dat continue being bro n mei will be better for her. she jus answered "i'm fine wif anything" haiz.. this is the hardest thing i ever wanna say to her. these words doesn't come from my hrt....

guess i'll be staying online tonite till she log off ba.. jus wanna accompany her silently.. hmm.. still remember de other nite.. she asked me a few questions. i tink was maths ba. heez.. i went asking ppl in IRC to solve for her siaz. even surf the net to get some answers for her.. haha.. opps.. she noes about me asking ppl in IRC.. so paiseh can..

hmm.. today bought some cooling drinks for [02].. she's still having sore throat. spent the last bit of my allowance on her few cans of drinks.. hope there's enuff to last me till thurs wor..

i waited for her msg after work.. went down bedok area. hmm.. but she din msg me.. nvm.. she should be studying ba.. dun wanna disturb her.. left ard 8plus.. reach home soo tired sia..

saw a stoopid lizard.. arrghhh.. arsehole.. must be those fumigation thingy dat brought the lizard up.. *raise eyebrow* yeah.. today learnt about USA filing.. dat's cool..

oh ya.. last nite my CEO from Ohama came to visit us. hmm.. he look damn stern wor.. but last nite was fun.. the dinner was lyk damn shiok siaz.. the whole office sat down for dinner n drink at the hotel lounge.. haha.. yumm.. had too much drink last nite.. puke in the washroom siaz.. but luckily not drunk yet.. heez.. i realli wonder my drinking skill improves le wor.. :P can drink so much.. woohoo.. but still haben brush up my volka.. onli brush up my beer, wine, hard liquer..

hmm.. tonite was actualli kinda sad.. cuz of [02].. but anyway.. i tink its better for me to remain as wad i am ba.. her bro.. i'm jus too scare to luv again..

chimp^sad

long time nia blog le.. came in afew times.. but nothing blogged. met a special ger in my hrt ytd at 10.30pm wor.. she's [02].. =) n i wanna keepthis memory in me forever. so though my eye's are closing now, i stil must blog. =P
hmm.. she pop a question once asking me y i lyk her.. i've thought for a few days ever since she asked.. but up till date, i still haben find the answer.i guess maybe when u realli lyk a person, u dun need a reason ba..
ytd damn tired lor.. went wild wild wet ard 2plus.. suppose to haf more ppl turning up.. onli alisa, nel, ting, wenwen n me.. =X i've got no choice wor.. if i dun turn up, i've to wear bikini n parade ard.. kaoz.. "ke wu" hmm its was quite fun actualli.. we din meet up for about 2yrs le.. after WWW, we went pasir ris park.. was kinda bored there n wedecided to go party world.. heez.. dat's when i went [02]'s hse
i bought her 'pi ga gao' n stepsils for her throat. i took a cab to her hse n we stood by the road n chat for awhile.. heez.. we blocked the tiny road n 2 cars haffa squeeze through us.. i 'se bu de' leave her so earli.. so paid for the cab fare n tell him sayi'm getting off here.. heez. she asked me into her hse to sit for awhile.. hmm.. was bery shy actualli.. tried to reject.. but in the end, my legs listened to my hrt.. ahhaha.. ok anyway.. luckily she din see my red face mann.. hmm.. so paiseh..
haiz.. wondering when i can see her again.. miss her soo much..

13 hao xiang hao xiang hao xiang 02

today my birthday wor !!!!!!! yipee.. came out meet adeline at pasir ris park today.. she last min asked me out.. i was kinda bored staying at home.. we went to play pool den move over to "the blue hut" the place where me celebrate xb's birthday.. we sat there having our dinner.. ate alot siaz.. sooo full.. wished we din order so much food.. =X was waiting for xb to come.. heez.. finalli she came ard 11pm.. she was sick!! hmm.. if i noe i wun haf ask her come le.. felt so guilty.. adeline left shortly cuz sharon n her fren came to fetch her.. so left me n xb.. we stayed there till bout 12 plus 1 den i send her home..
though kinda boring .. but still was happi.. heez.

chimp birthday